Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
