How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
