we're blogging at a bar
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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