hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize