Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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