where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Alive.
So much puke
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
