I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Randomize