im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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