yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
