I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
