I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
