And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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