well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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