it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
my nose is crying tears of wow.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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