how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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