OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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