You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
