do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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