we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
