This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
