You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
