Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
