I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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