Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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