she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize