Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
