Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
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