She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
