I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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