if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
You're completely useless in the revolution.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
