maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
