Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I am full of burrito and curiosity
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
