Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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