idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I wish i was in the wii world.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
