I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize
