Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
This toilet bowl is my home.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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