Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
