don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
