She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
