the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Randomize
