HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I am puke
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
This baby is an asshole
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
