Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
