Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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