my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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