if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I need to stop coming to work sober
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
