Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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