I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
