everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
