You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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