Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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