dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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